There is a very particular picture of Halloween
Costume on, bucket in hand, out with a group of children until it is time to come home with far too many sweets. It can be brilliant. But it is not the only version of Halloween that counts.
Doing it differently is still joining in
If our child enjoyed the part he wanted to do, he took part. We do not need to extend the evening until it stops being enjoyable just to make it look like somebody else’s Halloween.
A costume can be optional
If something is itchy, hot, restrictive or simply not wanted that year, normal clothes are fine. A Halloween T-shirt, favourite hoodie or no Halloween clothing at all does not make the evening less legitimate.
Home can be part of the celebration
Answering the door, choosing sweets to hand out, carving a pumpkin, watching a film or having a Halloween-themed dinner can all give a child some of the occasion without the busiest parts.
Plans can change halfway through
A child might feel ready to go out at six and ready to come home at half past. We try not to make the earlier decision a contract.
Trick-or-treating, staying home, dressing up or not dressing up. They’re all Halloween.
Finding the version that works for our family
We want Halloween to be something our child remembers as fun, not something he had to push through because everybody else was still going. The version that works may change from year to year.
This is our family’s experience rather than medical advice, and every child is different. We share what has helped us in the hope that it gives other families a few useful ideas.